Butch McGuire's coming to Buffalo Grove?

I was dumbfounded.

There he was, sitting nice and relaxed -- Proverbial candidate and community activist Chicken Little.

Chicken Little

Generally this time of year I find him with his feathers really ruffled – between chicken soup for Passover and eggs for Easter, he’s nervous.

But not this year.  He looked cool, calm and collected.

I had to ask why this year was different from all other years.

“I have a plan,” he said, “for a new business in Buffalo Grove.”

Let me guess, I said, a comedy club.

“Nah,” he said, “I have something more original – and besides – it’s a proven success.”

I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear this, but good ‘ol C.L. never ceases to amaze me.

So what’s his big idea?

“Well,” he said “after attending the recent candidates’ forum, I’ve decided I need to continue the legacy of the man himself.”

Who? I asked.

Butch McGuire.

Excuse me – the late founder of what many consider the original singles bar?  Here in Buffalo Grove?

“Yep,” C.L. replied.

But wait, how do the candidates for the April 9 Village Board election factor into your decision to open a singles bar in Buffalo Grove?  Seriously, if I saw the slate of four on Division Street I’d probably give up drinking.

“It’s not the people, dummy, it’s the idea.”

I’m lost, I told him.

“OK, the candidates’ forum brought together a bunch of people who were curious what other people had to say – you know, like going into McGuire’s.”

It’s a stretch, I said, but OK, tell me more.

“And just like a singles bar, the folks hear the things they expect to hear.”

I was beginning to catch Little’s idea a bit.  The forum did produce a nice crowd and the candidates presented their stands, which is the stuff you expect and want to hear.

“From my perspective,” Little said, “I was able to walk away without fearing the sky is falling.”

But, I asked him, do you think the sincerity was there.

“Probably more, he said, because three of the four are repeat customers, so to speak.  In fact, I think I heard someone say, “excuse me, but what’s your sign?”

Not quite – I think someone was asking for a sign – a lawn sign.

“Oh, that makes sense.”

So do you still think a singles bar makes sense?

“Absolutely, if the lively art of conversation can bring people out for a candidates' forum, imagine what’s they do for fun and relaxation.”

C.L., I said, this is Buffalo Grove, where folks don’t come out unless...

“Yes, I know...the sky is falling.  Maybe I’ll need to have karaoke.”

Nah, I told him, some performers can be painful to listen to.

“True.  But the allure of conversation and heated debates could make it interesting.  Maybe I could give it a Chicago Cubs theme.”

What, only have a successful year every 105 years or fade every August?

“Well, there could be a lot of singles without much scoring.”

Don’t quit your day job, I told him.

C.L. said he has one concern about his single bars idea.

“I’ll need bouncers.  I mean what if a fight breaks out?”

No sweat, I said, just call 9-1-1.

“That’s my concern,” he said.

Why? I asked.

“What if I can’t get through?”