Joe Friday, eat your heart out...

It’s not the stuff Dragnet was made of -- somehow Chief Steve Balinski doesn’t strike as Officer Joe Friday. 

But the police reports yield some problems in the land of the big animals.  For example, a resident reported “...that she had an argument with her live in boyfriend and he left and has not returned…”  It’s not the stuff that Stabler and Benson deal with on a regular basis, if at all.

The village does, to my surprise, have its own special unit.  It’s not SVU or SUV, CI, CSI, or NCIS.

It’s the truck enforcement unit.  Really.

I happened to pull up behind the truck enforcement vehicle recently and was amazed – absolute amazed – that the village had such a unit.

Undaunted, I contacted Chief Balinski (who I think resembles Peter Boyle in Young Frankenstein) about the unit.

It’s a big deal.  We’re talking crackdown on overweight trucks, coordination of “between developers, trucking companies and the village.”  Huh?  According to Commander Steve Husak of the BGPD, the purpose here is to make sure there is coordinated “truck routing in and out of commercial job sites.”

Truckers beware... 

Husak also informed me that “This unit issues permits for overweight and oversize vehicles using Village maintained highways. These officers respond to complaints from residents about truck specific problems and they check trucks for safety and driver’s license classification violations”

The unit, Husak noted, also checks for overweight trucks.  How?  The village does not have truck weight checkpoints (like the ones on state road that never seem to be open).  Rest assured Buffalo Grovians; the TEU is equipped with portable scales and will, noted Husak, weigh suspected overweight trucks on site.

So how do you suspect an overweight truck?  It’s probably difficult unless it’s wearing Spandex, which reveals everything (there ought to be a law banning Spandex when someone’s weight exceeds AMA, FDA, CIA standards…but that’s a topic for another day).  Husak noted that the state has specific guidelines for trucks.  In a nutshell, maximum weight for large trucks is 80,000 pounds, which is a combined weight for truck and load.  So if you see a truck that needs an axle tuck, or one that’s avoiding whipped cream with its latte, it may be an indication that it’s fighting the battle of the bulge.

Of course, some trucks can skirt the issue.  Ever see a garbage truck?  Husak agrees.  “garbage trucks in general need to comply with the weight restrictions, which can be difficult for the drivers to manage as they collect refuse along their routes. Wet garbage weighs more than dry.”

So, as Mr. Portokalos: would say, there you go.

What’s needed know is a village wide S.O.S – Save Our Streets.  Residents can do this by drying their garbage.  This can be an easy task by eating only dry food.  Cereal will work fine; I’m not so sure about pasta.  It’s a small thing, but it will help the police department by making life easier for the TEU.

Who knows, before long we may see the CPU on the street, a move that could net the village thousands of dollars.

CPU?  That could be the next version of Law and Order.  “In the war on crime, telephone crimes are considered especially annoying.  In Buffalo Grove, the dedicated professionals who investigate these crimes are member of an elite squad know as the Cell Phone Unit – these are there stories.”

Mow 'em down?

Ever go to the village's web site?

It proclaims that "Everyone here is family...everyone here is welcome!"

Admit it, there may have been times when you wanted to put yourself up for adoption or wanted to run away from the family.

Yep, stuff happens.

I'm not sure how I came across this link on the web site, but it's one of those tidbits of information that there can be some community in community service.

If you look under the “residents” tab, there’s a link to the “Shovel and Lawn Care Referral” program.

The what?

According to the village:

“..this program is for residents who need assistance with shoveling and/or lawn care and those individuals in the community who are willing to offer an extra hand. Volunteers for this program can sign up by filling out the form designated for them below. The information on the form will be used to notify residents of the availability of volunteers and their contact information. Residents who are interested in this program must fill out a form as well and return it to the Office of the Village Manager. The information residents provide will be used as a contact reference to interested volunteers looking for work…”

I’m thinking – how cool is that?  My guess is it’s for persons with disabilities or the elderly – not for someone whose kid doesn’t want to tear himself away from the plasma TV.

The village is not only for people who need assistance, but volunteers – have a bored student at home this summer?  This could be a perfect opportunity for him or her to do some community service as well as get some exercise.

I’m also thinking, a dangerous thing I know, that maybe the Village Board could get involved.  Who knows, given some of the Board meetings I’ve attended they’d be great at dealing with crab grass.

There is one problem, however.  In the event we hit a dry spell, don’t pray for rain.  You’d only rile up Rob Sherman.

For details on this program, call 847-459-2525.

A bounce on the wild side?

At first glance, I thought it would be routine.  

I mean, really, how much discussion could there be about a place with a lot of trampolines?

Answer?  A lot.

Remember, folks, this is Buffalo Grove where nothing is left unturned.  I recall covering a village board meeting a number of years ago when the Board drilled representatives from Baker’s Square about their sign.  In the long run, they got their sign – it just didn’t help their food at all.

So imagine the concern the Village Board had when it was revealed that an operation specializing in trampolines wants to open in the village.  We’re not talking a trampoline or two; we’re talking about a facility with more than 121,000 square feet of space.  That’s a lot of bounce.  In fact, according to Xtreme trampoline’s web site, it offers “Xtreme Trampolines is large warehouse filled with commercial grade trampolines.   There are 5 separate trampoline courts, including a dodgeball court and a giant foam pit.  Customers pay by the hour to have a ton of fun!” 

I’m not sure the board is worried about Dodgeball (yes, it’s upper case and a trademark) or the highly popular “giant foam pit”, the Board’s main concern appears to be the way Xtreme Trampoline administers its specialty – jumping and flipping by generally untrained participants.  To no surprise, the village, as it generally does, had the public service agencies check on police and fire activity at Xtreme Trampolines’ current Carol Stream location.

Rest assured, it does not seem to be attracting undesirables as there does not seem to be much, if any, police activity.  The Fire Department found, however, that Xtreme Trampolines averages 3.4 ambulance calls a month, of which 75 percent (2.5) require advanced life support.  Fire Department representatives expressed concern about excessive time being used responding to emergency medical calls at Xtreme Trampolines.  Each call, it as noted, takes an average of two hours.  The Fire Department’s report also noted that the 3.4 ambulance calls in Carol Stream are by that village’s fire department.  There are additional medical calls handled by private ambulance companies based on the need by Xtreme Trampoline staff.

The ever-popular foam pit

At issue here is the nature of the injuries, which can range from sprained ankles to head injuries.  Granted, Xtreme Trampolines requires participants to sign a waiver (legal papers that absolve the business from anything when someone acts like a duck head), but that does not reduce the possibility of someone untrained in trampoline use trying some that they should not be trying.

Unreasonable?  A colleague of mine, who happens to be a gymnastics coach, says the danger of people injuring themselves on trampolines is very real – especially when they try to do flips.

So once again, the village is faced with scrutinizing a business that wants to enter the village.  To no surprise, there were a lot of questions at the June 6 Board meeting.  That is the nature of the village of Buffalo Grove, which has for years, not let any business in for the sake of generating tax dollars.

Which, if you think about it, may be a good thing because imagine what would happen if the Board approved Xtreme Trampolines and its owners put in a hockey rink?

Bounced checks

The little things can add up...

Sometimes the little things bug me. 

Like when the Cubs blow a lead, public officials ramble, parents let their kids "check out" in the self checkout lanes, and customer service representatives who can't provide customer service.

Also on this list, and to some people it may not be such a little thing, is when people are in such a "hurry" that they grab the first parking spot they find and use it.  Let me clarify one thing -- it's when the first spot they find is a handicapped parking spot. 

I vividly remember visiting a store at the corner of Aptakisic and Buffalo Grove roads when a soccer mom (sorry, just telling it like it is) pulled in driving an SUV that seemed like it was big enough to have two ZIP codes, parked in a handicapped spot and sashayed into a nail salon to get (presumably) her nails done.

It's a little thing, but it is:

1. Rude
2. Arrogant
3. Disrespectful
4. All of the above

The correct answer is 4 -- all of the above.  I am fortunate that I do not have any physical challenges or handicaps the limit my mobility.  There are others, many others, who are not so fortunate.

State, regional, and local governments have adapted strict regulations for handicapped parking.  We're not talking rocket science here folks, we're talking common sense and respect.

Recently, the Buffalo Grove Village Board, sparked by the concerns of Trustee Beverly Sussman, about the fines levied against those able body jerks who just can't walk an 50 feet and think arrogance is a handicap.

The fine is currently $250 for using a parking spot clearly marked for the handicapped.  Sussman wants it raise to $350.  The prevailing feeling was that warning of fines really don't deter folks from using the spots.

So what is the solution? Perhaps business owners in strip centers could sticker, or ticket (probably not) violators.   Some folks would probably want more active enforcement by the police department, but I am reluctant to have patrol officers taken off the streets and out of the neighborhoods to crack down on arrogance.

What may be needed is a re-evaluation of the penalties.

Do away with fines.

Some folks may simply see fines as a way to boost their frequent flyer points, so there's a return on their investment.

But what it it hit them where it hurts.

In a wheelchair.

Perhaps those folks who take per granted their ability to walk unassisted should get a taste of reality.

• First-time offenders -- a day as a wheelchair user driving a car.

• Second-time offenders -- two days as an electric wheelchair user driving a regular car.

• Third-time offenders -- two days as a wheelchair user driving a handicapped-equipped vehicle - -the kind that needs the extra space of a handicapped parking spot.

• Fourth-time offenders -- two days as an electric wheelchair user driving a handicapped-equipped vehicle - -the kind that needs the extra space of a handicapped parking spot.

Fifth-time offenders -- By the time some gets to this point they will proven themselves to be so callus that there's probably not much that can be done except really drive home the message.  In addition to requiring them to work with the village's Commission for Residents with Disabilities, how about if they  experience all of the above punishments with one additional twist.

Let's make sure they have someplace to go -- Like, say Misericordia or Little City where offenders can get first-hand look at why handicapped spaces are so important.

And let's not give them time to get their nails done first.

An "old boy" calls it a day...

Now that the dust of the April 5 election has settled and the next administration is getting ready to make its mark on things, it seems as though a few things may have been overlooked.

When the new board begins its tenure on May 2, it will welcome Andy Stein and Mike Terson to the dais and Jeff Braiman will move to center stage as Elliott Hartstein bids adieu to his Village Board career.

DeAnn Glover

But there will be one more farewell to be said, that to another one of the "old boy network."  After 16 year on the Village Board, DeAnn Glover is leaving her spot on the dais.

It strikes me odd how cynics like to hang the OBN tag on the Board, and overlook the work women have done on the Village Board.  Let's not call Glover a "boy" and certainly don't call her "old".  She rolled up sleeves just like most Board members do and worked on an array of projects.  She was liaison to the Cable Committee, the Library Committee and The Buffalo Grove Days Committee, to name a few.

Old boy?  How about dedicated resident?  Being surrounded by a myriad of attorneys never seemed to intimidate Glover -- her passions have always been the budget, Buffalo Grove Days and the "Pink Heals" campaign.

A broker and manager for a real estate firm, she brought her corporate tenacity to the Board -- along with a strong, but well thought-out opinion.

There is an exceptional pride that radiates from Glover as well.  No doubt, a pride in the village and what various departments and volunteers have done.  There's also a sense of pride that beams from her when she discussed her family.

A native of Nebraska, Glover plans to spend more time with her children and grandchildren, especially those now living in Kansas,  during retirement.  In fact, it's likely that Glover will move to Kansas to be  closer to her son and daughter-in-law and their kids.

Will she miss her work on the Village Board?  Odds are she will -- you just don't walk away from 16 years of community service with a twinge of fondness.

As for moving to Kansas -- there's no doubt she'll enjoy the time with family. But if you're expecting her to become Auntie Em -- think again.  She's been through more twisters than Auntie Em -- and came through them all.

Even with the "old boys".

A lesson from center ice

I love sports.

I've played, watched, coached, covered everything from NFL training camps to women's ice hockey.

I've had the chance to meet the classiest of the classiest (Ray Meyer) and up and comers whose names I can't remember.

Through it all, one of the coolest things in sports is the meeting at center ice at the end of a playoff series in the National Hockey League when both teams line up at center ice to shake hands, a gesture that ends the competition.  Sure, there are times when it's terse, but at least both sides have the decency to end it on a generally friendly note.

Maybe it's time to do that for municipal elections.

Maybe it's time to tell Rob Sherman to grow up and show some class.

To say Sherman lost in his bid to become Village Clerk is an understatement. Jan Sirabian destroyed Sherman at the polls by gathering  90.05 percent of the vote in the Cook County side of the village.  He mustered 109 votes -- I have more Facebook friends than that.

In Lake County, Robbypoo picked up 21.10 percent of the vote to Sirabian's 78.90 percent.  Sherman received  687 votes, which is smaller than the graduating class at Stevenson High School.  Most people would have been gracious in defeat.  The keyword here is most.

But not Rob Sherman.  Instead, he continued his classless barrage of arrogant and sexist remarks as he continued to rip Sirabian.  Media reports, most written by folks considered to be "ace reporters", so we know they must be true, reported that Sherman saw his defeat as an mandate that people want Sirabian out.

Let's work this out.  Siabian gets 3,556 and Sherman gets  796.  Mandate? Where?  Sirabian receive more votes in Cook County (987) than Sherman's total.

So where's the mandate?  In Sherman's cranial cavity.

To no surprise, it's all about Sherman and his boorish ego.  It always was.  Sherman never had any interest in the Village Clerk's post, he just wanted to further boost his ego at the expense of a dedicated public servant and, more annoyingly, at taxpayer's expense.

To give you a classic example of Sherman's hypocrisy, he  told the Daily Herald that, if nothing else, “At least, I had the opportunity to put the fear of God into her.”


Huh?  Sherman -- I thought you were an atheist, or is that just another one of your PR ploys. This coming from a guy who allegedly sits down during the pledge of allegiance when it comes to "under God".   I guess when there's a media opp, all bets are off.


Sherman has also told media outlets that he now plans to move to the Cayman Islands once his daughter graduates high school this spring. 


You know the Cayman Islands, where the largest island, Grand Cayman, has a section called Hell.


Let's see, Rob Sherman and Hell.  It seems like a likely match.


But before sails off to paradise, he may want to watch the upcoming NHL Playoffs.


He may learn something about sportsmanship.

And now, the end is near...

As of this writing (late Sunday afternoon following the Cubs loss), election day is a little more than a day away.

Fortunately.

The April 5 election has, as we all know by now, its share of elections that have, to say the least, had some interesting campaigns.

• Indian Trails Library Referendum.  The library grew out of its humble beginnings in a house in Wheeling to its facility on Schoenbeck Road.   Despite the fact that more and more people think they can get by with Wikipedia, a Nook or  Kindle, a library, make that a good library, offers more than books and CDs.  Resources and programming are at the foundation of any library and residents in the district are fortunate to have a facility as comprehensive as the Indian Trails Public Library.  Of course, if you wave a checkbook around and yell movie in a crowded firehouse, you may think the referendum was robbing you blind.   For example, Rob Sherman, Buffalo Grove's answer to Lar "America First" Daly, thinks it's yet another conspiracy.  Maybe Robbypoo forgot that he spent a lot of time in libraries soaking up knowledge as a young annoyance.  Or maybe he did not need a library since he thought he knew everything anyway.  A forefront of any community is the strength of its ability to provide education -- schools and libraries are front and center and both need community support.  Sherman, as usual, is quick with ridicule and ideas -- but short, very short, on a record of action.

• The District 125 School Board Election.  While the current board has made some poor decisions, it's made up of people who can separate church and state.  Literally.   The 125for125 claim they're concerned about giving students choices and finances.  The reality is their platform is predicated on moral issues and imparting those on an entire student body.  This was the case in 2009 when members of the now slate called the school newspapers "pornography".  This in response to articles on "Hooking Up" (based on a New York Times report) and the Gay-Straight Alliance dance.  Staff members, one of whom is allegedly Gay, approved both articles.  That does not and should not impact the quality of education being delivered.  The slate has avoided issues of student expression, book banning and curriculum alteration based on its moral beliefs.  The bottom line is this -- the moral majority is neither.  Stevenson has a long tradition of academic excellence; and while the current board has thrown speed bumps and detours along the road, a board that puts its own morality about quality quality education would close the road.

And finally,

•   The Village Board races.  The race between Andrew Stein and Denice Bocek has all the excitement and interest of shopping for oatmeal.  They're both dedicated residents and they both want to serve for two years.  On the other hand, there's the race for Village Clerk, pitting incumbent Jan Sirabian against resident egomaniac and atheist Rob Sherman.  Sherman's platform is riddled with disrespect toward public officials, women, and the office in general.  Sherman is full of "ideas" that he thinks will improve things in the village -- yet he has yet to step up and do anything for the village.  Sirabian, like any public official, has had her ups and downs -- but she has done as stellar job of not stooping to Sherman's arrogance and boorish campaign tactics.  Sherman takes pride in exploiting women in a manner that's unbecoming a public official.  His latest allegation has been to tag Sirabian as "Dirty Tricks Jan."  Really?  Maybe Sherman needs to look in the mirror and take a look in the mirror.  What he may see is a series of blemishes in character, a record of non public service, and a history of publicity stunts to do little more than call attention to him.  Public service is not a "me first" proposition -- it's for the good of the whole.  Hopefully voters realize that and vote for the good of the entire village.